Cultivating GRATITUDE

The Personal Wellness Center Love Is... And Cultivating Gratitude

Cultivating GRATITUDE

I used to think that everyone was grateful all the time.  It took me over 50 years to find out that most people don’t have a regular gratitude practice.  As a therapist and life coach I encourage people to have a gratitude practice because when you focus on what you appreciate, it changes the chemistry in your body and you can feel the positive effects faster than any pill you can take.

As a young child, at night, I often found something to be grateful about; if it was raining I was especially grateful that I had a bed where to rest my head, a home that protected me and kept me dry and safe.  I still do that at night, and I also think of the many people who do not have a bed they can call their own.  As I was building resilience as a young child I noticed that my parents had a really bad relationship and I chose to be grateful that I had parents who took care of me.  Who taught me to gratitude? No one, I think.  I believe I developed as a survival mechanism because my life, probably like yours, had many challenges.

Expressing gratitude can transform your life at many levels just like complaining can; the choice is yours.  Gratitude is a function of attention.  I remember not too long ago my mother was complaining about how bad and unhappy she felt, I gave her paper and pen and said: “mom I want you to write one hundred things for which you are grateful.”  I guaranteed her that she would feel so much better.  She started writing and after a while she said “I feel much better, can I stop writing now?” There is a science to gratitude and it is a lot more than saying “thank you.”  Can you feel it in your body?  Can you visualize it? Can you express it?  When I tell my husband how grateful I am that he is in my life, his face softens, his eyes sparkle and a smile begins to emerge.

As a young foreigner I fell in love with Thanksgiving Day in this country; it was a totally new concept for me.   I thought how COOL is this, the number one country in the world pauses one whole day, to give thanks …. AMAZING!  Thirty five years ago on Thanksgiving Day everything was closed giving people an opportunity to stay home, connect with family and reflect on gratitude.  It is a beautiful tradition and needless to say it is one of my favorite holidays.  Modern times have changed that a bit.  I noticed that more and more stores are open and we have more distractions.  Sometimes we get so busy with the logistics of celebrating the holiday that we tend to forget its true meaning. 

We are living in a modern era where life is moving fast, it’s not just a feeling but a reality.  Gratitude can help us become more connected and grounded in the present moment, the only true moment.  And for us busy, busy people we need to make gratitude our attitude.  We have to let go of the belief that need to have more time available to cultivate an attitude of gratitude, we just need to be aware of it throughout the day.  Whenever you are feeling angry, sad or impatient let that be the sign you need to shift your attention and ask yourself what could you be grateful for at this moment.  Most likely those negative feelings will begin to transform quickly as you give thanks.  At night make it a habit to go through a list of what you are grateful for and you will invite quietude into your mind and peace into your heart.  Happy Thanksgiving!

 
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Veronica Correa, LCSW-C, is a licensed clinical social worker, certified hypnotherapist and life coach.

To learn more about her work visit: www.thepersonalwellnesscenter.com 

or call 410-742-6016